How to Make Someone (or Yourself) Squirt
How to Make Someone (or Yourself) Squirt
What is squirting?
If you’ve never squirted, you might think it’s something that comes naturally to some bodies and isn’t possible for others. In fact, many vagina-owners are probably capable of squirting.
Squirting describes the release of fluid from the urethra (the tube that carries pee, and in the case of people with penises, semen, out of the body) in response to sexual stimulation. Squirting has been recognized by various cultures, from China to Greece, for more than 2,000 years (Korda et al., 2010). Squirting is often pleasurable, and sometimes happens at the same time as orgasm (Salama, et al., 2015).
While there is still debate in the scientific community about what, exactly, the fluid produced during squirting is made of, it is most likely a combination of urine and a clear or milky-colored fluid produced by special glands around the urethra (Salama et al.). If you’re turned on by squirting but don’t like the thought of peeing during sex, it can be helpful to remember than urine is mostly water and can be clear and almost odorless if you’re well-hydrated. Also, the mechanisms for peeing and squirting are very different: When you pee, you are voluntarily emptying your bladder in a controlled manner, whereas squirting involves a sudden, involuntary expulsion of fluid (Salama et al.).
Some sex educators—including sex researcher and NYU sexuality professor Dr. Zhana Vrangalova—believe that most people with a vagina can learn how to squirt. That’s because the gushing, geyser-like response most people associate with squirting is believed to come from the bladder and out of the urethra.
“Literally every single vagina-owner has this anatomical structure,” Dr. Vrangalova explains to O.school. “So the question is just, can you reach it in the right way at the right time under the right psychological circumstances?” (Personal communication, date??)
Here’s the most reliable way to do it:
Steps for making someone or yourself squirt.
1. Make sure you’re in the mood for sex involving squirting.
The buildup to squirting often requires lots of pressure on the upper internal wall of the vagina using repetitive, fast motions with your fingers, a partner’s fingers, or a toy. It can be a high-energy process, which may be sexy in some cases but unappealing in others. Because it involves the release of fluids from your body—sometimes a large amount—it can also feel very vulnerable. If you’re experimenting with squirting with a partner, have a conversation beforehand about both of your expectations, comfort-levels, and any concerns you may have. Try it when you (and your partner, if applicable) are relaxed, comfortable, and interested in a high-intensity sexual activity.
2. Prepare your space.
Using towels, a water resistant throw, or absorbent pads on the bed, floor, or wherever you’re playing can help you to let go of worries about a potential mess and make you feel more relaxed. You can even get in the bathtub or shower!
3. Pee beforehand.
When you’re about to squirt, it often feels like you’re about to pee—something many people worry about and try to stop. Since squirting involves the release of fluid, holding back in this way can make it difficult to relax enough to squirt. Peeing beforehand can help you feel more confident and less inhibited.
For many people with vulvas, stimulating the external clit (the nub of raised tissue where the outer labia meet at the top of the vulva) can be a great way to get turned on, fast. Use whatever type of touch turns you on the most—light stroking, rapid rubbing, varied pressure, or a combination of techniques. You can also use a vibrator, or have a partner use their mouth.
For people of all genders, becoming sexually aroused causes the genitals to fill up with blood and become swollen: Just like people with penises may develop an erection in response to sexual stimulation, people with vulvas often experience engorgement (swelling) of the clit and vaginal tissue when they’re turned on (Levin, 2002). The G-spot can be easier to find and stimulate when the vagina is engorged, says Dr. Vrangalova, so getting super turned on is a great way to prepare yourself for squirting.
5. Find the G-spot.
Although there is disagreement about exactly what the G-spot is, where it’s located, or even whether it exists at all, many people with vulvas enjoy G-spot stimulation (Jannini, et al., 2010). For many vulva-owners, the G-spot is an area of rough or spongy tissue located an inch or two inside the vaginal opening, where the vagina and internal clitoris intersect. “The G-spot is on the belly-button side of the vagina, typically a few inches in,” says Kait Scalisi, MPH, an O.school Pleasure Pro, certified sex educator, and founder of Passion by Kait. “For some vagina owners, it feels different than the rest of the vagina: more like the roof of your mouth versus the inside of your cheek.” (Personal communication, date??)
6. Use up-and-down motions to stimulate the G-spot.
Use two fingers about two knuckles in or a firm, curved toy to stimulate the G-spot. (The NJoy Pure Wand is a favorite for G-spot stimulation, though anything with a curve can work well.) Scalisi recommends tapping movements, massage, a “come-hither” signal, or stroking for optimal G-spot stimulation. In general, up-and-down pressure is better for G-spot stimulation than an in-and-out motion.
7. Build up the pressure.
Lean into whichever technique feels best for your body—and keep going. The harder you press, the easier it will be for it to release liquid from your urethra. A repetitive motion with increasing speed and pressure works best; according to Scalisi, as much pressure as a “good shoulder massage” might be necessary.
8. Lean into the feeling of needing to pee—it’s a good sign!
Don’t hold it in—just relax into it and let it go. You might even try bearing down the way you would when you’re peeing.
9. Listen to bodily cues.
Although G-spot stimulation is widely considered the most reliable way to make someone squirt, it’s certainly not the only way (Whipple, 2015). Dr. Vrangalova’s research on squirting has found that a variety of sensations, including vaginal penetration, clitoral stimulation, anal stimulation, or some combination of these, can result in squirting (Vrangalova, personal communication, date?). If the G-spot-centric method isn’t working for you, you can explore different types of sensation to see what may work for your body.
Even if squirting is possible for many vagina owners, it may not be easy to achieve. It can be a fun addition to your sex life, but you can also have pleasurable, adventurous, and intense sex without squirting. Dr. Vrangalova emphasizes: “Plenty of people have extremely satisfying sex lives with amazing orgasms without ever squirting, and they seem to be doing just fine.”
Korda, MD, Joanna, Sue Goldstein, and Frank Sommer, MD. 2010. “Sexual Medicine History: The History of Female Ejaculation.” The Journal of Sexual Medicine 7, no. 5 (May): 1965-1975 https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1743-6109.2010.01720.x
Salama, MD, Samuel, Florence Boitrelle, MD, Amélie Gauquelin, CM, Lydia Malagrida, MD, Nicolas Thiounn, PhD, MD, and Pierre Desvaux, MD. 2015. “Nature and origin of ‘squirting’ in female sexuality.” Journal of Sexual Medicine 12, no. 3 (December): 661-666 https://doi.org/10.1111/jsm.12799
Vrangalova, Zhana. Personal communication, date?
Levin MSc, PhD, Roy J. 2002. “The physiology of sexual arousal in the human female: a recreational and procreational synthesis.” Archives of Sexual Behavior 31, no. 5 (October): 405-411 doi:10.1023/a:1019836007416
Scalisi MPH, Kate. Personal communication, 2019
Jannini, MD, Emmanuel A., Beverly Whipple PhD, RN, FAAN, Sheryl A. Kingsberg, PhD, Odile Buisson, MD, Pierre Foldès, MD, Yoram Vardi, MD. 2010. “Who’s Afraid of the G-spot?” The Journal of Sexual Medicine 7, no. 1 (January): 25-34 https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1743-6109.2009.01613.x
Whipple, Beverly. 2015. “Female ejaculation, G spot, A spot, and should we be looking for spots?” Current Sexual Health Reports 7, no. 2 (March): 59-62 doi:10.1007/s11930-015-0041-2