Is Squirting Real?
One of the hottest and most mysterious sexual topics of our times, here’s what we know about squirting.
Squirting happens when fluid is released from the urethra of a person with a vulva during sexual activity. Many people believe that squirting is the same as or indicates orgasm, but this is not the case! For people with vulvas, squirting is completely separate from climax. It can happen before, after or at the time of orgasm. Squirting fluid, sometimes called “squirt”, can come out in a little spurt that you might not even notice, or it can gush out and soak the mattress.
We know that squirting is a real thing—lots of people have done it. However, more scientific research is needed for us to fully understand this aspect of sexuality, as there are still many unanswered questions about what the fluid is exactly and where it comes from.
Is Squirting Fluid Pee?
With squirting, there’s a common question that often arises: “Is it pee?” Research tells us that squirting is a distinct fluid that is not pee (although some pee may be released at the same time).
Squirting fluid can come out in a little spurt that you might not even notice, or it can gush out and soak the mattress.
Squirting fluid has a different chemical makeup and isn’t the same as urine1. Some scientists believe the fluid comes from the Skene’s glands (which may be related to the prostate).
When a person squirts a large amount of fluid however, some of it may come from the bladder. Scientists don’t yet know for sure what the fluid is made up of, nor do they know exactly where it comes from. More research is needed!
How Do You Learn To Squirt?
Given the massive amount of attention squirting gets in our society, many people are eager to learn how to do it. And some people do report that it makes their orgasm feel stronger—while others says it feels the same.
If you're curious to discover whether you can squirt and want to try it out as a fun project, go for it! However, if you feel like you “should” be able to, or you're doing it only because your partner wants you to, your body may tense up which will actually make it harder to squirt. If this is the case, consider setting the project aside.
If you do try to learn how to squirt, many people find that g-spot stimulation is the most effective way to make it happen. The g-spot can be massaged with a firm, curved g-spot toy or with finger tips.
Many people find that g-spot stimulation is the most effective way to induce squirting.
Releasing the pelvic floor muscles at the right moment - as opposed to clenching, which many of us do without realising it - can also help squirting to happen. When you’re trying to learn to squirt, have patience, stay hydrated, and keep practicing!
Squirting Comes Easily To Some And Not Others
The takeaway on squirting is that we live in a diverse world: Some people wish they could squirt and try without success to make it happen, while some people squirt easily but find it inconvenient and wish they could control it.
If you fall into the latter category and squirting is putting a damper on your sex life, try laying down a towel, purchasing a Fascinator Throe, or even putting down puppy pads to make cleanup easier.
If you fall into the former category, know that it can be difficult and even counterproductive to attempt to force your body to do something. For the happiest and healthiest sex life, try focusing as much as possible on pleasurable sensation—rather than performance!
Milan Zaviacic, Sylvia Dolezalova, Igor Karol Holoman, Alexandra Zaviacicova, Miroslav Mikulecky & Valer Brázdil (1988) Concentrations of fructose in female ejaculate and urine: A comparative biochemical study, The Journal of Sex Research, 24:1, 319-325, DOI: 10.1080/00224498809551431. https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00224498809551431
”Nature and Origin of “Squirting” in Female Sexuality." Salama MD. (24 December 2014) Journal of Sexual Medicine. https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/jsm.1279
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Is Period Sex OK?
Is it ok to have sex on your period? It sure is! So if you want to, go for it. Read on for tips on comfort, pleasure, and mess management.
It seems like menstruation is slowly becoming more talked about and normalized. It’s about time! Most people with a uterus menstruate at some point in their lives, so why not discuss it? The days of being embarrassed to buy tampons and pads are over. Now there are many more choices like cups and sponges and everything in an abundance of sizes and styles.
Sex On Your Period Is A-Okay!
Speaking of choice, it’s high time we discussed period sex. Here’s the bottom line, if you want to have period sex, there is no reason not to. If you don’t want to, well then don’t. If you might want to but have some questions, then read on.
If you want to have period sex, there is no reason not to. If you don’t want to, well then don’t.
It’s a lot more fun talking about sex than about cramps, and some people’s libidos are super charged during period days so wanting to have sex while you’re menstruating is a common thing. If this is you, go for it with a few tips on communication, safety and, of course, pleasure.
Start By Discussing Period Sex With Your Partner
Let’s say either you, or your partner, wants to try period sex. Anytime you want to try something new in the bedroom, it’s a good idea to begin with a conversation. Don’t assume - discuss!
Be kind and always talk about how you feel, not how your partner should feel. Listen. If you just quiet down and listen, you’ll be surprised at how much information you are able to receive from your partner.
What Sort Of Period Sex Are You Comfortable With?
Decide on your comfort levels for period sex. Just touching, yes or no to oral, penetration with fingers, or with a toy or penis? Then you have a guide and you will be able to push the envelope through agreement and not surprise.
Safer Sex When Menstruating
Just like other body fluids, your menstrual blood will carry STI’s. It’s always a good idea to make sure you and your partner have been tested. During your period your cervix is higher and more open, so bacteria flows more freely.
Decide on your comfort levels for period sex. Just touching, yes or no to oral, penetration with fingers, or with a toy or penis?
Why Am I Horny When I’m On My Period Anyway?
Remember, it’s normal to feel extra horny after you begin menstruating. Progesterone, which has been building up to help fertilize an egg, is at a low point when you don’t need to fertilize that egg and you get your period. Progesterone lowers libido so your libido builds when progesterone is low. It’s science.
Estrogen and testosterone will soon kick in and put your libido at its high point around week two of your cycle. That’s when you’re most likely to conceive. Get it?
How To Deal With The Blood During Period Sex
Worried about the blood? Did you know that during your entire period, you only release 3-4 tablespoons of blood? It doesn’t all come out during sex either.
During that communication part you may find that neither of you are really bothered by the blood and you’ll both enjoy the added lubrication from more fluids in your vagina. In which case, just put a dark towel underneath you and go for it.
Or, if you want an easier clean up, shower sex is a great option! Let the blood wash straight off down the drain.
Just put a dark towel underneath you and go for it... Or, if you want an easier clean up, shower sex is a great option!
Still not convinced but want to try? Using a menstrual disc or a sponge that sits up high, closer to your cervix, will absorb most of the blood before it flows out of you. These methods are different from a tampon FYI - you do not want to leave a tampon in during penetration! A tampon is great for external play or oral sex though.
Best Sex Positions When On Your Period
Try out different positions to see what feels best when you have your period. Since your cervix moves up a little bit higher during menstruation, the feelings may be different. If doggie style is normally painful, it may not be because of the extra lubrication and higher cervix. Also, missionary style or anything where you’re on your back will result in less blood on the sheets.
Orgasms Can Help Ease Cramps!
There is no biological reason to avoid sex during menstruation. In fact, if you have cramps, sex may be just the thing to lessen them since orgasms release endorphins and help to relax the uterus. Period sex may be a whole new adventure for you. Remember to stay safe, try different positions and use a dark colored towel. The rest is just another sexy exploration. Enjoy!