How many times have you seen a blowjob in film or television featuring the Giver kneeling at the foot of a bed, while the Receiver sits and chills? The Kneeling Position is absolutely an option, but blowjobs have a secret life you may not know about: BJs are a super versatile sex act with lots of potential for reciprocal pleasure! 

Blowjobs can be amazing for both the Giver and the Receiver! 

Before we dive into the best BJ positions, here’s what to love about blowjobs: 

1. Blowjobs can be amazing for both the Giver and the Receiver!
2. They can be just as delicious as a warmup or as part of “coreplay” ("the main event" in any given sexual scenario). 
3. Because the average person with a penis takes about four or five minutes to climax, they can be quick when time is of the essence. Meanwhile, when time is no issue, BJs can be delightfully drawn out for maximum tantalizing pleasure. 
4. Finally, when genital-to-genital sex isn’t preferred, or isn’t an option, a blowjob can still get everyone where they want to go!
   

What BJ Technique Does Your Partner Like?

Keen communication is crucial in any situation involving sex, but it is especially important to negotiate before offering a blowjob since the Giver’s mouth will be otherwise occupied during oral sex. If your partner isn’t very verbal about sex, be sure to ask them what they like and don’t like. Are there things you should avoid and are there things they want you to keep doing? 

Keep in mind that playing around with different rhythms and pressure levels (especially when using your hands in addition to your mouth) can be a fun part of your exploration, as long as both partners are mindful of the cues their partner is sending. Be sure to check-in with your partner throughout sexy time. 

It is especially important to negotiate before offering a blowjob since The Giver’s mouth will be otherwise occupied during oral sex.

Last, but certainly not least, don’t be afraid to discuss what is in it for you with your partner! If stimulation and climax is desired by the Giver as well, and the position agreed upon isn’t one that is inherently reciprocal - like a 69 - a hands-free vibrator is an excellent option. The Jive by We-Vibe, the Eva II, and the Mimic are great wearable vibes.

Top Blowjob Positions 

Here are four top blowjob positions for you to try whatever your needs and preferences:

1. The Kneeling Blowjob Position 

The Receiver is seated or standing while the Giver kneels in front.‍

Pro: This is a good starting position. There is easy access to the penis, and also to the scrotum. Don’t neglect the scrotum or the perineum! This is great for bigger penises because it allows the Giver more control over depth and speed.

Con: If the Receiver has a penis with a curve angling up, or the penis at attention is a 90° angle, this can be uncomfortable for both partners. The more comfortable both partners are, the better!

2. The “T” Shape Blowjob Position ‍

The Receiver sits or lays flat, while the Giver lays out to the side, perpendicular to the Receiver - so they make a T shape together.‍

Pro: Great if the Receiver’s penis has a significant curve to the left or right. The Receiver can thrust easily from the hips and the Giver can rest their head on the receiver’s thigh while having more “wiggle room” for comfort.

Con: This position takes up a lot of room which may be difficult on a small bed.

3. The “69” Blowjob Position‍

One partner lays down and the other lays, or is on all fours, above them. Partners are head-to-toe and give each other oral simultaneously.‍

A modification of the classic 69 is the “Side 69”, (also called “The Pisces”). In this variant, partners facing each other on their sides, head to toe.

Pro: The Receiver gets to return the favor of oral stimulation. The 69 position and its variants also allow the Receiver to be deeper in the Giver’s mouth at an easier, more maneuverable angle. If one (or both!) partners enjoy a little bit of rimming, the person on the bottom can easily access the person on top’s butt.

Con: A person with a penis will probably need to stay on the bottom with this one. If a penis owner is on top, it can be difficult for the Giver to keep the penis in their mouth unless they support their head with a small pillow or neck roll. In the Side 69, The Giver’s shoulder may get sore. One remedy is for The Giver to try alternating between their left and right sides.

‍‍4. The Lie Back Blowjob Position (For Advanced BJ Givers Only!)  ‍

The Receiver stands at the edge of the bed, while the Giver’s lays on their back, with their head tilted back slightly off the bed. ‍

Pro: The Receiver will be doing most of the work, but that doesn’t mean that there is nothing for the Giver to get out of it! The Receiver can use their hands to massage the Giver’s body and arouse them digitally or with a favorite vibrator. This position can be good for deepthroating.

Con: This position is not for beginners as the Receiver will have almost complete control. The Giver needs to trust that their partner won’t get carried away and thrust uncomfortably down their throat (unless that is what the Giver wants and has negotiated beforehand). If you have a strong gag reflex, this might not be the best position for you!

Communication should always be a given, but it is extra important to clearly communicate your needs and have agreement from your partner before practicing the Lie Back position.

The best thing about blowjobs is the potential for variability and versatility; this list is definitely not exhaustive. Use these five positions as springboards from which to experiment and explore the different ways each partner enjoys the pleasures of oral sex.