It’s easy to lose the romance and playfulness with our significant others, especially in long-term relationships. Over time, people can fall into predictable patterns that make flirtation, spontaneity, and romance more difficult. However, getting into this rut isn’t inevitable! Maintaining feelings of romance in long-term relationships is absolutely possible, it just takes a little bit of effort.
Research published in the Review of General Psychology found that people who reported greater feelings of romantic love felt more satisfied in all their relationships, both short-term and long-term. That means the effort we put in to stoke the fires of romance really pays off.
So, how do you build romance in long-term relationships? Here are some proven strategies:
Take Care Of Yourself
Research shows feelings of high self-esteem and a general sense of well-being helps romance flourish. That means it’s important to take care of yourself, so that you have the capacity to take care of your partner.
Over time, people can fall into predictable patterns that make flirtation, spontaneity, and romance more difficult. However, getting into this rut isn’t inevitable!
Find time for the things that make you feel healthy and good about yourself. Make time for your favorite hobby, do your favorite kind of exercise, and give yourself time to rest. If you look after yourself, you’re better able to look after your partner.
Go On An Adventure Together
Going on an adventure together is a great way to break out of the convenient patterns long-term relationships often fall into. Breaking those patterns creates space for spontaneity and romance to flourish.
Adventure doesn’t have to be expensive. Try a new restaurant, or take a walk in a new park. Learn a new dance, or go to a karaoke bar and sing new songs. See a movie you’d not normally choose, or try an activity you’ve never done before. Try a new sexual position, or buy a new sex toy to use together. Try dirty talk, a blindfold, or soft restraints. If you shake up your routine, you’ll shake up each other’s expectations and make your long-term relationship feel brand-new.
Make Time For Kissing
Kissing is a great, intimate way to regularly connect with your partner. And there are so many different ways to kiss that it’s easy to mix things up. No matter how you do it, making time to make out will help you and your partner feel close and keep the fires of romance burning.
Try Some Sexy Role Play
Role play is another great way to build romance in long-term relationships. You can use role play to explore one another’s sexual fantasies, and it helps to make sex more creative. With role play, the only limits are your imagination.
If you shake up your routine, you’ll shake up each other’s expectations and make your long-term relationship feel brand-new.
A fun and easy role play idea is to arrange to meet your lover at a bar or restaurant 10 minutes apart. Once you’re both there, pretend you’re strangers meeting for the first time. One of you strikes up a conversation with the other and flirts. You can be yourselves, or pretend you’re completely different people. If you role play at a hotel, you can even get a room!
Role plays can be simple or more elaborate depending on your mood and the time available. Other role play ideas could be reenacting the first time you had sex together, acting out your favorite scene of 50 Shades of Grey, or role playing characters from a movie or show that you both like (whether that means being Batman and Robin or Maria and Captain Von Trapp!).
In the end, keeping the romance alive is about getting creative, breaking out of your routines, and, most importantly, remembering to have fun with your partner. So put some play in your day and watch the romance come roaring back.