Fact No. 1
Fact No. 2
Fact No. 3
Fact No. 4
The Quickie
4 minutes
read

Some people with vulvas are lucky. They never had to hunt for their clit, and instead feel like they’ve always just known where it is. But for others, it can take time and effort to find it—and that’s OK, too! And looking for your partner’s clit when you don’t have the same anatomy can make this powerhouse pleasure-button even trickier to track down. Happily, as far as search expeditions go, this is a decidedly fun one...

When it comes to zeroing in on the clit, there are generally three main options. The first is using a mirror to look at the vulva and locate the clitoris visually. Other people feel around with their fingertips to locate the clitoral head by touching it. Finally, some people take time to stroke their genitals, paying attention to sensation and looking for the most sensitive area.

No matter the route you decide to go, here are all the details for searching success:

What To Look For

The head of the clitoris looks like an oval-shaped bump that sits at the front of the vulva, about one to two inches up from the vagina. The size of the head of the clitoris varies for different people, but you’re looking for something that’s approximately pea-sized. The head of the clit is covered by a piece of skin called the clitorial hood, so to get a full visual, you may need to gently pull the skin back. Placing your hand on the pubic bone and gently pulling the skin up is a good way to expose the head of the clit. When you do this, you may see on the underside of the head an upside-down “V”-shaped area, which is a piece of connective tissue called the frenulum.

The clitoris, vulva, labia, vagina and pubic bone
The size of the head of the clitoris varies for different people, but you’re looking for something that’s approximately pea-sized.

This pea-sized nub and its underside, however, are just the parts of the clit that you can see. The clitoris has a much larger internal structure that swells when it becomes aroused. That said, the head is the most sensitive part, and where most people focus their stimulation.

What To Feel For

If you are feeling around for the clit with your hands: start by placing a fingertip just under the belly button, and running the finger straight down the abdomen and over the pubic mound (where hair grows) until you reach the soft skin just under the pubic bone (where hair doesn’t grow). If you press this area gently with your fingertip you may feel a line of tissue running up and down under the skin, which is the shaft of the clitoris. The skin you’re feeling is the clitoral hood. The head of the clit is a little further down, underneath this skin. Use one of your fingers to gently draw this skin upwards, and use another finger to feel for the head of the clit. Depending upon your particular clit size, you may feel a prominent bump, or you may not feel any bump at all. But either way, be gentle: this area can be very sensitive, especially with the clitoral hood pulled back! Use a soft touch and put some lube on your finger to keep it comfortable.

Depending upon your particular clit size, you may feel a prominent bump, or you may not feel any bump at all.

What Sensations To Pay Attention To

If you are stroking the vulva to find the clit by sensation, there are a number of techniques you can try:

  • You can place a pillow on the bed and rub your vulva up against it.
  • You can use your hand to caress your vulva, stroking with a harder or softer pressure in different spots to explore the different sensations.
  • You can use a vibrator to see which parts respond best to vibration.

What will it feel like when you’re successfully stimulating the clitoris? It may feel highly sensitive (though not for everyone); it might be concentrated or focused in a specific area; it may feel a bit weird at first; or it might feel really good and make you want to keep going! Because the head can be so sensitive, it can feel uncomfortable, or even painful, if you touch it too hard, too directly, or if there is too much friction. If this is the case for you, try touching around—rather than directly on—the most sensitive area and see if that is more comfortable. Be sure to use gentle pressure, as well as lube or saliva, to reduce friction.

Happy exploring!

Related Articles:

O.riginal: The Clitoris

What Is The Clit?

What is your Vulva? What are the Parts of a Vagina?

Types of Orgasms: Clit Orgasm vs G-Spot Orgasm

Eating Pussy Tips

Best Masturbation Techniques for Clitoral Orgasm

References

Myths and facts

Setting the record straight.

No items found.

Perspectives

At O.school, we know that few things are one-size-fits-all. Read on for insights from Pleasure Professionals and other experts:

No items found.

Community voices

Check out what the O.school Community is buzzing about and send your questions and stories to submit@o.school.

Upcoming streams

Want more? Check out our live streams and on demand videos.

No related streams available.

View full calendar

Sex Ed Videos

Previously recorded streams we love.

How To Stimulate A Clit
Play
Video

How To Stimulate A Clit

Looking to unlock clitoral orgasm? Sexologist Colby Marie Z gives her top tips for how to stimulate a clitoris. Get (or give) the pussy pleasure you desire!

Approaching Sex After Birth
Play
Video

Approaching Sex After Birth

Our bodies and sex lives change after childbirth. Pleasure Professional Lucia Pavone will break down the in's and out's of sex after birth and address anxieties about getting back into the sheets.

What You Need to Know About G Spots
Play
Video

What You Need to Know About G Spots

Do I have one? Where is it? Why can’t my partner find it? Am I supposed to squirt? This AMA on G-spots will help you discover your orgasm diversity and offer tips for exploring your G-spot with toys, fingers and partners.

Video transcript

So, up here is kind of, there's a little, maybe a little shaft of the clitoris. So this can be a bunch of different sizes, too. Some people maybe the clitoris really only does stick out a little bit, and that's totally fine. Some people, it may be a little larger or hang a little lower, and that's fine too. Everyone's bodies are really different. So, the clitoris, it usually feels quite nice if someone were to stimulate this area. Sometimes on one side, or more than the other may be true too. And that is so fun to figure out. If people just experiment with what feels good they're able to communicate that more. It's important that when people are trying to figure out what feels good for them, that they really try and pay attention because then they can better communicate to partners if they're having trouble with that. Or, they just can have awesome sex with themselves which is a whole 'nother thing that some people like to do.