My First Time is a series exploring what it's like to try a new sex act, toy, or sexual experience. O.school has not been paid or sponsored by products mentioned. Any review of a product is based on the writer's personal experiences and opinions.
I always get more turned on when I’m on my period — I find myself getting more distracted during the workday and taking breaks to rub one out more often. I crave sex way more than usual, and I’m pretty much steadily turned on throughout the entire week without any external stimuli, on any given cycle. My trusty Hitachi vibe and my husband both see more action, and I have lots of orgasms, every moon time. It’s great. But there’s one course I’ve never felt comfortable charting during that time of the month: receiving oral sex.
I’ve read that it’s safe, but it’s just not something I’ve ever wanted to do. It’s not just the blood factor — it also has to do with the fact that I also tend to experience hyper-sensitivity everywhere on my body, and direct stimulation on my vulva can physically hurt when I’m menstruating.
On the other hand, I’d also be lying if I said that the blood part of the equation didn’t play into my lack of interest. I’ve read lots of articles in the past few months (quarantine = extra time for Google search rabbit holes!) about how period oral is safe, and that we should embrace all of our natural secretions in their natural glory, and our partner should embrace all of our secretions in kind. And if we don’t, we’re succumbing to internalized shame.
I get why this kind of messaging is happening. Women are shamed far too much about being sexual beings; society should empower us to enjoy all the pleasure our bodies have to offer us, yet we’ve been taught pretty much the opposite throughout most of history.
But the reality is, I wouldn’t want blood in my mouth; and even if my partner were into it, or didn’t have an issue with it, the idea is a mood-killer for me. Something about the idea of the metallic taste, and the mess, and seeing it in his mouth, and tasting that metallic scent after he kisses me. It turns me off. I wish it didn’t, because I sometimes have felt like it’s a personal or feminist failing to admit that it’s just not my bag. But it was what it was.
That’s why, despite being someone who loves oral sex, and who craves it even more when I’m on my period, I never thought I’d have a positive experience receiving oral during that time of the month.
This recently changed when a new invention called Lorals caught my eye, after I read about it in an article online. Lorals were described as thin, stretchy latex underwear designed to be worn during oral sex as a fluid barrier. You put them on right before having oral sex. I thought the barrier might even take away some of my hypersensitivity during my period, without taking away the sensation too much. And also, since they prevent fluid transfer, I wouldn’t have to worry about period blood.
I sent my husband a link to the product via a text: “next time I’m on my period?”.
My husband and I are usually pretty adventurous when it comes to bringing new toys into the bedroom, so it didn’t come as a surprise when he told me he was down to try them. Still, I found myself feeling both excited and...relieved that he had said yes, which did take me by surprise! I realized I had probably wanted to try oral sex while on my period, a bit more than I was consciously aware of.
When the shipment arrived, I was at the earlier part of my cycle, which is when I’m the horniest but also have a heavy flow. So the timing was perfect. My husband and I unwrapped the packaging together, and we took our time with the unboxing experience. Trying out new toys together has given us a healthy sense of novelty and variety during the pandemic, so we’ve purposefully enjoyed keeping up this habit. It’s been great self-care for both of us, and we like to savor the full experience.
My husband had fun adjusting them around my body, and noted that the latex panties smelled good. I agreed. They didn’t have that overly rubbery smell condoms have, which I think we were both expecting. I checked myself out in the mirror, and they actually looked genuinely sexy.
The rest of the experience played out super naturally— there was really no clumsiness or adjustment period that can sometimes come with trying out a new sex toy.
We started off slowly. He licked around my clit, and started rubbing the areas adjacent to my erogenous zones. The experience was such a turn on, and it didn’t take long for me to warm up to the point where I was enjoying every lick and touch on my clitoris and vulva through the super thin latex material.
Once I was warmed up, Lorals blended seamlessly into our playtime. My husband pulled a bit of the panties aside to lick my clit while fingering me through the latex undies, which felt somehow more incredible than usual. The Lorals panties were taut but stretchy, and we had fun snapping them on my body, which added another sensation to the mix, eventually leading to super-hot sex.
I read online that one user had an issue with the latex gripping her pubic hair, so I was prepped with lube nearby in case that became an issue; but I personally didn’t experience any gripping.
The best part: I was able to enjoy sweet, blissful orgasmic sex, without the hypersensitivity that I usually experience when I’m on my period. And in line with my original reason for buying the panties, there was also no blood transfer.
The whole experience changed my own relationship with my period. Where I had never really even considered the idea of enjoying oral sex during this week of the month (even though it was when I was most turned on), I now realized what I was missing. I had mentioned to my husband a while ago, earlier in our relationship, that I would probably never want oral sex on my period, so he had always just accepted it was off-limits. I still don’t think I ever will get over my aversion to blood as part of oral sex, but I do know I’m never going back to denying myself oral sex just because of my period.