ON-DEMAND

All About Erogenous Zones

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Wednesday, September 12, 2018

The G spot is just one of many erotic zones. Learn them all, you won't be sorry.

Video transcript

My name is Louise Bourchier, I'm a sex educator. I love teaching workshops on sexual health, sexual pleasure, and communication. I like teaching those workshops mainly to adult groups, different kinds of community groups, student groups. And I just think it's really valuable to learn sex ed because we seldom get all the education we need when we're at school. 'Cause a whole other stuff we need to learn when we're adults to have the sex lives and intimacy that we want. Okay, who else have we got joining us in the chat? Chris, hi, Chris, joining from Nebraska, excellent! We've got several time zones here 'cause I can see Oakland coming up, Nebraska, and I'm over in Eastern Canada, I'm on Halifax time. So here we all are. I don't know anyone else here who's not from North America yet? Okay, so, today, we're gonna be talking about the G-spot, but more than the G-spot, we're going beyond the G-spot. We're gonna take a tour of erogenous zones. So the plan of action today is we'll talk about what is an erogenous zone. And then I'm gonna explain erogenous zones, and emphasizing some of the main hot spots of erogenous sensation. And then we're gonna do some viewer questions. Now, if you have any questions that come up along the way, please pop them in the chat. Questions and comments are more than welcome. They're strongly encouraged. So, please, get amongst it and participate in the conversation today. Hi, Jenny! I'm so glad everyone's coming along and not only that you're viewing but you're also saying hi in the chat. That's the plan of action today. Before we get started, pat yourself on the back for coming along. Because I know for some of you, it might be your first time here, you might be thinking, oh gosh, what's gonna happen? I don't know what this sort of sex ed stuff is all about. So, well done for coming along. Sometimes, it's a big step, and I want you to pat yourself on the back. I'm gonna be trying to keep it kind of fun and light today but, you know, no one's neutral to sex, so well done for coming along. You've really made a big step by coming. Sacramento, excellent, Austin, great. Lots of people from all around the place. That's really cool. Okay, so. What is an erogenous zone? That is the first question. So if you have a thought about what an erogenous zone is, type it in the chat. There is a little bit of a delay on the chat, so I might've already said your answer before it goes down, sorry if I do. But tell me what you think an erogenous zone is. It's a word you hear a fair amount but it's kind of a bit ill-defined. Exactly what is an erogenous zone? Type it in there, but I am actually gonna jump the gun a bit and tell you what I think it is. An erogenous zone is basically an area of sensitivity that can arouse a person, can turn them on. It's a part of the body that is sexually sensitive or it's wired in some kind of way that when it's touched in the right way, by the right person in the right context, it can create sexual arousal and desire and sexual sensation. Often, erogenous zones are kind of divided into two categories. You've got the primary erogenous zones, which is more or less the genitals. And then you've got secondary erogenous zones which is other parts of the body which are not directly connected to the genitals and the kind of sexual parts, but can also feel really sexy and arousing when they're touched. I'm gonna jump in the chat and see what people are saying. Mischief-O says an erogenous zone is a place that feels good when it's touched. Yes, absolutely. And J7, welcome, says it's an area that when touched, gives sexual pleasure. Absolutely. Absolutely. I'm gonna bring up my naughty little notes here to make sure I haven't forgotten any of the things I was gonna say about what an erogenous zone is. Let's have a look. Yup, exactly. Sexually sensitive, erotic, and it can turn you on. Okay, what I did want to mention is that the context and the manner in which this area is touched is really important. An erogenous zone is not just always sexually sensitive. So, if you're a person who likes, who considers your ears an erogenous zone, for example, if you have a person who you're into touching them, you're feeling kind of, you know, open to sexual energy, and the touch is just right, that can be really hot. But if someone grabs your ear too hard or if it's kind of, you know, rubbed in a different context, it wouldn't create any kind of sexual sensation. So, it's not kind of a magic-button place you just have to press, it's just a place that when treated by the right person in the right context, can lead to nice sexual sensations. Okay, so Justin's introducing himself, everybody. Justin's our moderator today. Thanks, Justin. The moderator is here, Justin is here to keep the chat light and fun and on-track, and ready to help with any kind of questions. And, yeah, Justin and I are at the team today tackling the Beyond the G-Spot Stream. By the way I just noticed when I stepped forward that I've got a piece of jeweler on today, can anyone guess what this little feller is? It's a little broach, so you can take a moment to type in the chat if you know what my broach on my badge is. It's a fun little piece of sexy jewelry. Okay, so erogenous zones, there an area of sexual sensitivity, they only work when they're touched in the right way, the right rhythm or the right text, or the right lightness or the right kind of touch by the right people in the right moment, and you know, really any part of the body can be an erogenous zone. So, there is every part of the body, probably in the world to somebody who finds that area of their body sexually sensitive. So erogenous zones you could say are really all just in the brain. 'Cause it's all about how your mind interprets the sensations from that part of the body. That being said, we can kind of generalize about these things, so there have been two recent studies on erogenous zones, one was done by a group of researchers in Finland, and the other was done by researchers some of whom were in the UK and some of whom were in South Africa, so that was the second study. And both those studies looked at which parts of the body were erogenous zones or erotically sensitive for people. So the Finnish study had these images where people had to like color in the parts of the body using a computer program that they found sexually enjoyable, and they might have had like a different color for the parts that were most enjoyable and parts that were somewhat enjoyable. And the other study that was based in the UK slash South Africa, they had a list of different body parts, and people ranked them, you know, ranked them by which were the body parts they found most sexually sensitive. And although there is a whole range of individual variation, it's clear from these studies that there are lots of generalizations that we can make about the parts of the body that are the most sexually sensitive, or the most erogenous or erotic. Because both the studies found really similar results. And in total they had over a thousand participants. There were about 700 I think in the Finnish study, and 800 in the other study. So, interesting stuff, I'm gonna be drawing on some of the results of their research today. Okay, so what have we got, Mischief O. Says, it's a G-spot toy, referring to my badge, and it's so cute. Yes, thank you, it's a cartoon version of the Pure Wand, which is a G-spot toy. It's a, the toy itself is much bigger than my little badge, the toy is kind of like that long, and it's a middle sort of curved smiley shape with two round balls, one on each end, and it's used to go inside the body to stimulate the G-spot, or can be used also as a prostate toy. So people who are into G-spot stuff, it's a very popular toy, but we'll be talking about the G-spot a little further on. Okay, so, shall we start talking about, the difference between erogenous zones and erogenous hot spots or primary and secondary. So I mentioned earlier that there's kind of two types of erogenous zones. There's the primary erogenous zones, which is essentially the genitals, so that's like the clitoris, the vagina or G-spot, the penis, the anus for some people, so those are kind of like the number one sexual zones. And that doesn't surprise people, right? Those are the genitals, those are the parts we typically think of as being associated with sex, and feeling good, and sexy. And then you've got other parts of the body which are like the secondary erogenous zones, so let's start by taking a tour from head to toe of erogenous zones, so focusing on those secondary erogenous zones, and then we'll go right down to genitals, and we'll talk about them as well. If you have any questions as we go along, or any comments, pop them in the chat, I'd love to hear from you. Alright, so from head to toe, drawing on the research that I read about with the Finnish and the other study, the top sort of, like let's say 10 or so erogenous zones, included the head, did you know that? People like to have their hair and their heads stroked as an erogenous zone, perhaps certain parts of their head, around the back, ruffling up the hair, so that can be an erogenous zone for many people. Not a number one, it doesn't get in the top five, but that is a part of the body which people do find sexually enjoyable to be touched. On to number one, in terms of this walk down the body. We get to our old friend, the ears. So I already mentioned the ears before, and the ears for me, people, are erogenous zone. Some people like to have their ears gently nibbled or bitten some people like to have their ears licked in here, or just behind their ears. So let me emphasize again, gotta be the right person, gotta be the right time, gotta be you know, not too hard, not too soft, but some people really like to have their ears touched to generate sexual arousal and some nice sexy sensations. Mischief O. Says plus one head. Plus one for the head? Tell me what you mean, definitely the head has heaps and heaps of different erogenous zones, but the scalp, I was interested to find that one. I think when you hear erogenous zones, often you think of like nipples, but you don't necessarily think of the scalp as being an erogenous zone. Yeah, also the head, nice. Awesome. So yeah, the ears definitely are an erogenous zone for many people, And then coming on down, another part of the body that was prominent in the studies, and I think a lot of people would agree is an erogenous zone is the neck. So that include the back of the neck, the part where the hair of the head meets the neck, or the part where the neck kind of joins down onto the shoulders, the back of the neck there is sensitive for a lot of people. And also the side of the neck. So down underneath the ear, down to the collarbone. So those parts of the neck can be really sexually sensitive for people. So people might like to have those areas sucked, or licked, or nibbled, or stroked, of course the side of the neck is typically where hickies are given. And I guess a lot of that has to do with the fact that this is a sexually sensitive or an area of the body that gives sexual sensations. So having kissing and sucking on the neck there can feel good, a lot of people really like that. Jumping into the chat, what have we got down here? I have inverted nipples, any advice on how to stimulate them? I think they're less sensitive than other nipples. Good question, I'll address that one Chris as we get a little bit further down towards the nipples. I'm not sure actually if inverted nipples would be less sensitive, but I guess, it's people with the experience of having them that would know. That's an interesting comment. Okay so over to ears and neck, so these parts of the body are sexually sensitive areas, erogenous zones. And then of course, our old friend the lips. No surprise there although maybe we often don't think about the lips as being an erogenous zone, but of course we use the lips for kissing, and we use the lips for you know, putting kisses on a persons body and for oral sex. And the lips are very much part of our erotic mapping. The lips, the mouth and the lips can also enjoy different sort of tastes or different sensations like, what's the word? Like ice, you know, things like that can be sexually arousing to have in the mouth. So the mouth definitely an erogenous zone as well. Moving on down, okay, one thing that came up in the studies that I was interested in was that people commented on kind of like the shoulder blades, the side of the back, and the armpits as being sexually sensitive. Perhaps not like the number one kind of area, but certainly areas that are sexually enjoyable for many people. So they talked about how some people like to have their shoulder blades or sort of side of the back area kissed, and some people like to have their armpits kissed and licked. And certainly, what do you call that sort of muscle that goes down the back of the armpit? That can be a sexually sensitive area for some people. It's one of those things I think that some people are really like armpits are really cool, other people might be a little bit sort of put off, like oh no, will it smell a bit funny? Or will I tickle my partner? So it's probably worth having a little bit of a conversation about, or you know a short conversation, doesn't need to be a full on interview, but just like a hey, do you reckon you'd be interested in me, you know, touching your armpits? But it can be an area of sexual sensitivity. So if you haven't discovered that on your own body or a partners, maybe you haven't experimented, you might wanna give that one a go. Alright over to the nipples. This'll hopefully address some of your question there Chris. So the nipples, unsurprisingly came up as one of the main erogenous zones. So more so on female identified people. But on any kind of body. So on all different kinds of gendered people, although the studies only categorize people as male and female, they identified the nipples as being sexually sensitive, and a major erogenous zone. So, the whole area, like the whole breast area, I feel like I'm being very graphic, talking about my own body, the whole breast area is an erogenous zone for many people. So having the whole, the breast massaged or gently squeezed, rubbed, can be enjoyable for many people. And the nipple is kind of like the main focus of sensation on that area. So the nipple has a whole bunch of nerve endings, although for some people it's like a major area of sexual sensation, some people can orgasm from having their nipples stimulated. And for some people it's like a major thing, they really need to have their nipples included in sexual play. Whereas for other people, the nipple might be less sexually sensitive, and for some people it could even be like an unpleasant or sort of off putting or slightly irritating sensation to have their nipples played with. But for the majority of people, these studies have shown that it's very often an erogenous zone that brings a lot of pleasure to people. So the ways the nipple can be stimulated are through licking, stroking, using the whole hand, see this is my nipple, imagine this is the nipple, using the whole hand on the breast, where the fingers or the knuckles are rubbing over the nipple, they can be really nice. Because there's such a range of sensation in the nipple, you'll find that people enjoy a range of different kinds of stimulation. So people will say you can, bite my nipple hard, squeeze my nipple hard, that's what I like. Some people are in that category, some people are down the end of, you know, my nipples are really sensitive, please only touch them lightly, other people are in the middle. If they're quite aroused they might enjoy a gentle squeezing of the nipple, or kind of a rougher touch. But certainly again, if you're not sure, ask, because using biting or using the rougher touch could be really unpleasant or painful to someone who's not expecting it. But there's a whole range on the kinds of play or stimulation people like. Tiffany L asked, can ticklish areas also be sensitive? I was actually reading that maybe that's one of the reasons why those areas are sexually sensitive, that they have more nerves, and they can also therefore be ticklish under different context. So in a sitting where you're kind of ready for sexual arousal, you're kind of, what's the word, feeling ready for that kind of stimulation, it can be sexy, where the persons gonna turn you on like that where as if somebody unexpectedly, you know, lunges for your neck, or lunges for your armpit, then it can be quite ticklish, and it might actually be the same nerve, the richness of nerves that leads it to either feeling, sexy or ticklish, depending on the context. So, yeah I think it's, and also some people do kind of get turned on from being tickled. You know, you get tickled and you kind of feel a bit panicked and it can be kind of a sexy, you know, sort of fun panic. A sort of, kind of getting overwhelmed can be a sexy feeling, so absolutely. Tickling itself can be sexually enjoyable for some people. Okay, Andrea says nipples are huge for me, can't orgasm without it, but some of my partners don't feel anything at all. Yeah, absolutely, isn't it interesting? Another thing that adds to the variation of nipple sensation is hormonal cycles. So particularly people have a menstrual cycle, different parts of the menstrual cycle, the breast and the nipples can feel really different. So, at certain parts of the menstrual cycle it might be quite uncomfortable to touch the nipples, whereas other parts it might be really great. And some people find that the breasts can get tender or swollen and they might not enjoy being touched, just before menstruation for example. So there's a whole, the whole raft of reasons why nipple stuff can be awesome, but can also be really varied. So yeah, when in doubt go for a nicer kind of touch. And certainly check in, you know, checking in and asking about these things doesn't have to be this kind of mechanical unsexy thing, it can totally be dirty talk, like oh hey, do you like that? How does that feel? Do you want more of that, more pressure, less pressure? Just simple questions like that can really help improve the experience for somebody, rather than going forward with a type of stimulation which is not exactly doing it. Yeah, interesting, there's also interesting things about the nipples. So back to Chris's question about inverter nipples, and advice on how to stimulate them. I actually don't know of any advice that specifically relates to inverted nipples. I can't think of any time where I've ever seen any advice or have, my intuition says that if you have less sensitive nipples that using a more firm kind of stimulation, like perhaps a squeezing, or a gentle biting, might create more sensation, but if your nipples are not sensitive, and you're just kind of not really, and it's not like a major area of sexual sensation, then it might just not be one of the areas to focus on. But if anyone else who's there has, who's watching today has any other advice, I'd be really keen to get your contribution in the chat, that'd be really terrific. We'll crowd source our answers to make sure we get some really really awesome stuff out there. Okay, Chris is also asking about cervical orgasms, very curious, yes, we will get there. So we're gonna go down the body, going through erogenous zones, then we're gonna go straight to the genitals and talk about those bits. So I'll talk about the cervix a little bit when we get there. Okay, Jenny says, how about inner arms, sides of ribs, and tops of hands? I've always liked light touches there. Excellent, yeah, absolutely. So, inner arms, that's an area of kind of that, sort of, what's the word? Like, the light, sensitive skin there, that can be a really nice area to be touched. Especially up the, you know, the upper part of the arm. Sides of the ribs, yeah, absolutely. So moving down the body, in those studies that I was referring to, they all mention that the waist and the hips, sort of the side of the body, the sides of the body, are an area of sexual sensitivity, an erogenous zone for many people. So if you experience that kind of erogenous zone on the side of the ribs Jenny, then you're amongst others. Top of the hands. So, hands didn't feature prominently in the studies where they were kind of getting all people's results together, but they weren't down at the very bottom either. They, in terms of parts of the body, I guess there's lots of nerves in the hands, you know we've got lots of nerves in our fingers and stuff, and that can be an area of sexual sensitivity too. I guess one thing that's interesting is that erogenous zones depend on how your own body's mapped, in terms of nerves and sensation, but also in terms of experience, you know? If you had a positive experience with a partner that you had really good times with and they used to do a certain thing where they would touch a certain part of your body, it can kind of make that part of your body feel sexually relevant. I remember I had a friend when I was living in Wellington in New Zealand who dated this guy who would nibble her kneecaps. And she had previously never thought about kneecaps as being an erogenous zone for her, but because of the positive experience she had with him, she came to associate, you know, knee pleasure, knee nibbling as being like a sexy thing that she enjoyed. So I guess there's lots of reasons why we find different certain things erogenous zones. Mischief O says OMG, hands are such a spot for me. Yeah, fingers, some people really like having their fingers sucked, that's a really lovely thing to do too, especially because of the nerve endings on there. Justin says it sounds pretty much like any sensitive area can be a secondary erogenous zones, with the right set of mind. Yeah, absolutely, absolutely, absolutely. So moving down from the study, so we're gonna like just jump past the genitals because I'm gonna come back to that soon. But buttocks, your butt, I guess unsurprisingly, was another erogenous zone that came up in those studies. So having your butt rubbed, and massaged, and licked, and nibbled, so I'm not talking like in the crack, I'm just meaning on the cheeks, that was an area that came up for a lot of people. And I guess people who enjoy spanking on their butt, maybe that's part of what's going on there too. Going on down lower in the body, there were fewer areas that consistently came up as erogenous zones. So of course as we know, people like, my friend enjoyed having her kneecaps nibbled, and some people commented in those studies that they enjoyed having the backs of their knees kissed. Whereas fewer people consistently talked about those areas. Maybe the, I don't think they had the leg came up for male identified people, the back of the thigh. But again, not high up in the study. What interested me and interested the researchers was that the feet came fairly low, so sometimes we think, or you know, people often think that the foot is an erogenous zone for many people. And of course it is an erogenous zone for some people, but it seems that it's perhaps not a major erogenous zone for a large number of people. Doesn't mean it's not good to get a foot massage, but yeah, so I'm sure there are, yeah there are many people for who foot sucking, and licking, and massage is an erotic practice, but it may be more of a minority than we perhaps think straight away. Okay, let's have a look. Jenny said, oh I don't like the top of the knee, but the back of the knee, shutter. Yes, exactly, that soft sensitive skin, a little bit like the skin on the arm actually, now I'm seeing your other comment Jenny, it's a little bit like that similar skin, isn't it? On the back of the knee, so maybe there's something going on there. Another comment from Jenny, my BF thought it was weird that I had all these spots. I don't know, it gives you lots of options, you know? I mean, everybody is different in their erotic mapping. And part of the fun of the partnership is finding what works for a different partner, and I don't know, if weird is so much the word, but perhaps unique, you might have areas that are rare for other people to find sexually sensitive. But I think that it's great that you have lots of options there. So, Justin's commenting there, happy we're all here, Justin's the moderator today, and reminding us that there is a tip system. So down in the bottom in the corner there, if you'd like to give a tip to O School and myself, just click on the tip jar, I will be very grateful. And what does Mischief O have to say? I just read a study that the most common fetish is feet. So that is surprising. Well, that is interesting. I wonder if the foot fetish is based on the foot being an erogenous zone or if it's more like, somebody appreciating another persons foot. 'Cause that's not so much their own erogenous zone. I'm curious about these studies. I mean the foot is definitely an erogenous zone for some people, it's not that it's not, but in the studies that I was reading it kind of came like in the lower half of the list, rather than the upper half of the list. So, it wasn't as much of an erogenous zone as people might sometimes think. Although a caveat, those studies mainly were looking at white western populations, not exclusively, they had studied participants from the UK, South Africa, and Finland, you know, a few places, but it wasn't like it had a broad, cultural, multinational sample. But yeah, anyway. So, what does New Girl have to say? Hi Mischief O, I was just thinking that it seems that people are attracted to feet, wonder if it's more in their mind then the actual feet. Yeah, maybe we have a whole opportunity to do a stream on foot fetishes and foot play. Interesting. And I received a tip, wonderful, thank you Clitasaurus. Thank you for letting me know Clitasaurus. Okay, great. I think I'm up to date on the comments that are coming in. Okay, so where did I get up to? So I've gone, I've scanned the body for this sort of secondary, as we call them, erogenous zones. Although for some people the nipples is very much a major erogenous zone, side note. But now let's go to the genitals. So in all of those studies, and I think in, from common knowledge, we know that the genitals are the areas that have the most nerve endings, and the most sexual sensitivity for many people. So, top of the list there is clitoris, yay, not a surprise. There was like an opportunity to get out my dear friend, the clit model. And accompanying vulva puppet. Some of you who have seen my other streams must be like, oh man, we always see the vulva puppet and the clit model. Well, I think there's always an opportunity to bring out my favorite teaching tools. So this is a vulva puppet. Here you've got the outer lavia, inner lavia, inside here is the vagina, and up here is our dear friend the clitoris. So, the clitoris has a lot of nerve endings. It has about 8,000 nerve endings, although that's an estimate because studies still haven't really told us exactly how many, but there's lots of nerve endings in the clitoris. And so because there's so many nerve endings it's not surprising that it's a major erogenous zone. So must of those nerve endings are located in the head of the clitoris, which is the part that you can access either directly or through the clitoral hood, rubbing the fingers, or a toy, or a tongue, or whatever tickles your fancy onto the clitoris. But there's a whole structure underneath as well. Ta-dah ta-dah! This is the clitoris in all of it's glory, and so the full structure of the clitoris is three or four inches which is, how many centimeters? Let's see, I'm the New Zealander, I'm supposed to know centimeters straight up, but anyway, three or four inches long in total. And so yes, most of the nerve endings are focused in the head of the clitoris, which is the part you see from the outside of the body. Which on the model is just represented by this part here, but there's a whole structure under the skin, which has other, more nerve endings as well, in these erectile tissues that go under the skin and stretch down on the side of the entrance to the vagina. So there's lots of potential sensation with the clitoris. So because the clit has so many nerve endings, yes, great for sexual sensation, and obviously a major erogenous zone, but it can be, yeah, really intense to touch. So it's always important to approach with, what's the word, gentleness. Because some people like to have their clitoris touched indirectly, so above kind of on the hood of the clitoris. Or along the sides, rather than directly on the head of the clitoris, and some people love to have their clitoris touched directly on the head for more sensation. So there's lots of ways to work that part of the body, but it is kind of a common mistake that people think, oh okay, so it's one of the major areas of sexual sensation, so I'm gonna go right there, I'm gonna press really hard. Actually that's not a very good way to charm the clitoris. It's much better to work on other erogenous zones, certainly early on in a sexy, you know, section. And then as a person gets more aroused, you can work towards the clitoris, and rub around it and then if the person wants, then you rub onto it as well. So yeah. Clit, a great area of possibility, but just be gentle. Another, okay, back to the questions, don't wanna jump the gun here. Micky Allen, hello Micky Allen, I believe you're doing the stream after mine, lovely to have you here. Late to join, did we discuss the brain as a primary erogenous zone? I did mention it, yes, I mentioned at the beginning that there are lots of different erogenous zones. Some kind of common erogenous zones, although anywhere in the body can be one. But yeah, that it's mainly coming from the brain. It's all about how your mind interprets the sensations you're feeling. So yeah, I mean side note, there's lots of different things that you're sensors can process that can turn you on. It's not just touch, right? You can have some sounds, like music, or words that you find sexy, or you could have things which are visually appealing, like you see a hot person, or you watch some kind of pornography that appeals to you. It could be certain kinds of smells and tastes, there's a range of ways that our sensory input can turn us on. The erogenous zones is the physical mapping, the way that physical touch on the body can turn us on. Okay, what have we got here? New Girl asks, do slash can psych drugs make the clit less sensitive? My friend and I were comparing, or is it just not as sensitive, we call it a soldier for some of us? Nice. Both, people can have clits that are more or less sensitive. Some people I know are just like hey, my clits not actually that sensitive, I'm much more of a G-spot person, or I need a really hard, like a strong vibration for my clitoris to feel good. So some people definitely have a less sensitive clitoris. And some people are more sensitive clitoris, but also, absolutely as you say, psych drugs, so particularly, is it antidepressants or antianxiety medications? Antidepressants, although often there are similar medications out there. So antidepressants can definitely make the clitoris less sensitive. I think that also, aging, as in, I think hormonal changes at menopause can make the clitoris less sensitive, well that's interesting. So yeah, certainly drug influences can make the clitoris less sensitive. And also they can just make it more difficult to orgasm. So even somebody who enjoys sexual sensation from their clitoris, even though they're taking a drug which might reduce sensitivity, like they can really enjoy that sensation, but sometimes people find it hard to climax or to reach kind of more intense levels of pleasure, because those drugs can kind of subdue the sexual arousal or sensations. Yeah. It's a frustrating side effect for many people. Many people of course appreciate those drugs and the improvements they have on many parts of their life, but regret the impact it can have on their sex life. I think JoEllen Notte who teaches under the name the Redhead Bedhead, she does a sex and depression workshop. She's probably written quite a few things on sex and depression. So she could be a person to look up some of her work, her last name is Notte, if you're interested in that area. There's a number of people actually who speak on it. New Girl says charm the clitoris, love that phrase. Yay, do you also love when I swallow the word clitoris because of my New Zealand accent? Okaylet's progress on. Okay, let's progress on, so we looked at the clit. Obviously, next comment, the whole vulva can be an erogenous zone, slash is an erogenous zone for many people. So, another opportunity to get out the puppet, so yes the clitoris has a lot of nerve endings, but there's lots of nerve endings in the outer lavia and the inner lavia, this whole area can be really nice to touch. So you can use, get a little bit of lube on the palm of the hand, and rub the whole vulva that can be really enjoyable for many people. You could even just gently massage the inner lavia. All out of the outer lavia, those areas can be really nice to touch. There's also of course the vagina, which goes up inside the body, and in there there are several sensitive areas that we'll talk about. So the vagina actually isn't as sexually sensitive as the clitoris for the majority of people. It's not to say it's not a major area of sexual sensation, but the clitoris tends to be more of focal point of sensation, whereas the vagina, yeah, can feel really great, but basically 70 to 80% of people will prefer, or require clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm. So, vagina can feel great, but for most people, still the clitoris is kind of the main area of focus for genital, you know, sexier sensations, especially if you're trying to have an orgasm. But inside the vagina, we've got, the G-spot. It's time to talk about our namesake. The namesake of the stream, Beyond the G-Spot. So, inside the vagina, you've got, the first third of the vagina, which tends to be the most the most sexually sensitive. And then you've got the internal two-thirds of the vagina, which tend to be less sexually sensitive. So that first third of the vagina is the most sexually sensitive, because A there's those internal structures of the clitoris that stretch around the entrance of the vagina, so during penetration the legs of the clitoris, can be stimulated, and B, because of the G-spot. That was named after, as you may remember, Ernst Gräfenberg, so the G-Spot is an area, it's in the front wall of the vagina, so towards the, if you put your fingers in somebodies vagina, or your own fingers in your vagina, and press those fingers towards the front, like towards the bellybutton, then that's the place where you'd find the G-spot. So most of the vagina feels kind of like the sort of smooth inside skin of the cheek, like inside your mouth. But the clitoris often feels like a more spongy ridge texture, a bit more like the roof of the mouth, that kind of ridgy texture. So if you find that, that's probably what you're going for. So there's a lot of range with the G-spot, there's a lot of range with any part of the body in terms of sexual sensation and whether it's an erogenous zone, but especially I find with the G-spot. For some people it's like a major area, they really like it, they love having their G-spot touched, and some people love a really firm pressure. Whereas for other people it might just feel like they need to pee, or it might really not have a strong kind of sexual charge. It might be kind of like a little bit of fun but not a major thing for some people. So lots of this sort of wide experience with the G-spot. But for people who do like G-spot stimulation, they tend to prefer that sort of firmer massage pressure, which is where our friend the Pure Wand comes in. So this toy is a larger version of this, made of a shiny metal, and massaging that metal against the G-spot can feel really good. So it's more like, if you're gonna massage your shoulder after a long day of work or gardening or something, it's more like that kind of pressure to stimulate the G-spot. Chris says, damn learning so much. Great, I'm really glad that this is worthwhile for you, I'm glad you're learning lots, I should have told you to make some notes, get a pen and paper or whatever kind of modern tool you use to take notes. Yeah, there is lots of content, isn't there? And Chris also says, is the G-spot really just the clitoris? This is a question, a very good question, I'm really glad you asked that one. The answer is we're not exactly sure, we know that they are kind of connected, because the legs of the clitoris go inside the body, and the G-spot is very close, it's behind the pubic bone. Yeah, kind of just above where the legs of the clitoris go in, and so sometimes that area of the vagina, that sort of front wall, first third of the vagina can be called the clitoral complex, because there's less things going on. So might be connected, might kinda be the same, but there is also a bit of evidence that suggests that they are distinct things. So there's two different nerves that supply the different tissues, so the clitoris is supplied by the pudendal nerve, and the G-spot is supplied by another nerve that I've forgotten the name of. But they do actually have a different, slightly different wiring. And the G-spot is more, correlates more to the prostate on a male body, or on a body that's developed under the influence of testosterone. So, the G-spot does seem to be like a distinct tissue, although on some people it's prominent, where other people it's not prominent and it can feel really different for different people. But good, yeah, it's a good question, the reason I don't know the absolute answer is not because I haven't read, it's because I don't know because the research hasn't formally told us yet. So there's been quite a bit of research documenting the anatomy of a clitoris, and there's been a fair amount of research sort of like does the G-spot exist research. There hasn't been a whole lot of anatomical research to really look at how those structures are connected. Interesting, watch this space. Jenny says there's no way I can remember all this stuff, is there a way to watch the stream again later? Okay, so currently there isn't a way to watch it, but very soon there will be. So come back soon and there will be a way to watch future streams. Okay, where can I find a list of erogenous zones? Great question! I, have a list. What is that article? It's called Reports of Intimate Touch, Erogenous Zones and Somatosensory Cortical Organization. Okay, so that's where you can find a list of erogenous zones. Actually if you Google erogenous zones, there's a couple of academic articles that come up, and I recommend those. A bit nerdy, but that'll give you those comprehensive lists. Although to be honest, Wikipedia has a pretty good entry. So, it's a good place to start as well. Okay. Interesting, yeah, great, planning for the future for the stream, it's interesting different nerve systems for me, orgasms feel super different between clitoral and G-spot, yeah, absolutely. So we kind of know they're connected, and we kind of know they're different. But it remains to be seen exactly how the clitoris and the G-spot are related. Watch this space. Okay, so we've got 15 minutes, let's look at some more genital anatomy. So let's talk about, okay, we're gonna talk about cervix, right? That was the next part, we were up to the, we've done the first third of the vagina, so then there's the internal, deeper two-thirds of the vagina. So there's two parts inside there that some people find erogenous or sexually enjoyable to have stimulated. So some people report that they like having the I think it's called the anterior vaginal fornix stimulated, otherwise known as the A-spot. If you've seen the A-spot, it's an area on the front side of the vagina but further in then the G-spot. So the G-spot is relatively near the entrance to the vagina, whereas the A-spot as some people call it, although it's not so commonly talked about, and it's less consistently enjoyable for people, so less than a thing than the G-spot, but it is a thing for some people. The A-spot is inside that front wall of the vagina as well, but further in, deeper inside the vagina. And then there is the cervix. So, the cervix is the end of the vagina, and it's the entrance to the uterus essentially, so the uterus is sort of tucked up inside, you can't get into it unless you're using medical equipment, but that's where the vagina ends essentially. It kinda feels a bit like the end of your nose. If you feel something inside the vagina which has got kind of like a sort of a roundish prominent feel, and this like dent in the middle, that's actually what the cervix feels like. So the cervix, yeah, I feel like I'm saying the same thing several times but I do wanna impress how kind of consistently this is the case. The cervix is great for some people, and like really really into it, and really not great for some people, and really don't go there. There's a whole lot of variety with the cervix. So I have one friend, another friend, who loves orgasms that involve kind of focus on cervical stimulation, so cervical orgasms they can be called. That's really what she's into, she really enjoys that, so she likes quite deep penetration, and yeah, that's her thing, and there are other people in the same boat as her. There are people though who will say, please steer away from my cervix, it's quite uncomfortable, it's definitely not a sort of sexually enjoyable sensation when the cervix is touched during penetration. The cervix can, the sensitivity of the cervix is also really influenced by hormonal cycles. So, yeah, different points of the menstrual cycle, the cervix can feel really different, it can feel softer or firmer, it can feel more or less good to be touched. So yeah, lots of range there, there's loads of opportunities to kind of experiment and try what feels good for your body, because for some people it's like don't ever touch my cervix for some people it's like please always touch my cervix, for some people it's like maybe, there's the right time of the month, and you know, stars are aligned, then it can feel good. But yeah, it's definitely an area of sexual sensation for some people. Chris asked, does clitoral erectile tissue have a harder time getting aroused with age like the penis does? That is a very good question. I don't formally know the answer, but I think so. The reason I think so is because I know that vagina lubrication can reduce with age, I know that vaginal lubrication has to do with blood flow to the area and sort of arousal and swelling of the tissues. It's also to do with the hormones, so. My intuition says it does, but I don't have the research, but that's a great question, I think I would, but. Let me know, pop in the chat if you find an answer to that question, 'cause that's a really interesting one. Justin's reminding you the tip jar down there, so feel free to tap on that if you wanna send a tip to O School and myself. Okay, so, talked about the vagina, let's move on to the penis. So, the penis has lots of sexually sensitive areas too. And in all the studies I looked at it was the major erogenous zone or kind of erogenous hotspot on the male body or a body designated male at birth. So the penis has several different parts of it that can be sexually sensitive. The whole thing of course is quite sexually sensitive, people like to hold the shaft and move it up and down, and that can feel really great, so the whole thing structure can feel excellent, but the area that's the most sexually sensitive tends to be the corona. And I've got my work dildo. Ta-dah, my other puppet. To demonstrate. This dildo comes to us thanks to Device, a store in New Zealand, so it was hand poured in Wellington, it's like a boutique dildo. So, the head of the penis is this part of the penis here, and the corona is the ring around it, it's like the same word as a crown, right? So the corona, like the ring around the thumb, that's the part that tends to be the most sexually sensitive on the penis. And especially the frenulum here. So the frenulum is where the tissues join together on the under side of the penis, so those areas can be the most sexually sensitive. For a person who's not circumcised, the foreskin will come up over the head of the penis, and that skin can also be really sexually sensitive. So, ways that those tissues can be stimulated would be gentle linking, touching, sucking, caressing with the hands, squeezing, ask a person what they like, what sort of stimulation they like. But that's kind of the main area of sexual nerve endings on the penis. The, oh, while we're there, the scrotum, the balls, the testicles, can also be a nice erogenous zone for many people. So, people can enjoy having that area touched lightly on the skin. Some people can enjoy having that area sort of sucked, or you know, what's the word, have a little bit more kind of firm pressure on the area. And a smaller number still will enjoy kind of having the scrotum pulled in a more kind of firm play. But it's a little bit like I was saying with other parts of the body, go for a light touch, see how a person goes, if they like it, then you can consider doing a more firm kind of stimulation. But it can be a little bit too much, as we all know from the movies that, yeah, balls can be sensitive, so just approach with delicacy. I love that puppet too, purple is gorgeous, great, I'm glad you like my swag of sex demos. So, let's talk about the perineum, we've got nine minutes to go, so, I'll talk about the perineum and the anis, and then we'll do a couple of viewer questions that we had coming in before the stream. So, the perineum, I want you to pop in the chat, any other words for the perineum, 'cause there's a whole lot of different words for that area of the body. The perineum is the area that's, just in front of the anis basically. So for a person who has a vagina, it's the area between the vagina and the anis, for a person who's got a scrotum, it's the area behind the scrotum and in front of their anis. So it's that area there. And that area can be a major area of sexual sensation for many people, so, people can enjoy a light touch on that area, they can enjoy a more firm kind of massage pressure potentially as well. So, one reason people can enjoy that is because people who have a penis also have a prostate. Which is a little bit like a G-spot, and it's up inside the body. So, that can be accessed directly through the anis for somebody who's wanting to go down that avenue. Or it can be accessed indirectly by pressing on the perineum, so pressing on that area of skin can access that G-spot like tissue that is the prostate. The last but not least of our tour of the genital erogenous zones, the genital hot spots is the anis. So, I have a butt puppet of course too, it's just my hand, so you probably also have a butt puppet. The butt puppet can help me talk my way through the anis. So the anis is rich in nerve endings. Again, like other parts I've talked about, some people really like that part of the body being touched, it could be like a major area, they really, frequently like to be touched, and it might be really important for them having an orgasm, for some people it's like a no go zone, like no, please don't touch my butt, it's not sexy, it doesn't feel good. Some people also might like external touch of the anis but nothing inside their butt, there's a whole range of different things people enjoy. But the anis has lots of nerve endings, so because it's rich in nerve endings, there's lots of potential for sensation. So it can be nice to stroke that area with the finger, it can be nice to use a vibrator on that area, put a little bit of lube on the hand, maybe licking with the tongue, if the person's got a nice clean butt hole and you're down with that. And of course, some people also enjoy stimulation inside the anis, so penetrative anal sex, or butt plugs, or finger in the butt, all sorts of reasons, so the inside of the butt, in your rectum, there are, I think it's like pressure receptors in the walls there. So, it's not so much responsive to a light touch in the way the anis is, but it can be responsive to like having a butt plug or kind of a feeling of pressure of fullness in there. So, lots of reasons why my butt stuff can feel good for some people. Chris says, there is so much to know. Yes, well there is so much to know, there are lots of facts, and lots of things that can be really helpful to know about. I like the concept, I'm just looking at my phone to get the questions up. I like the concept of a sex lair, if you've ever heard of that, a sex lair is where you, you designate a time and place to try out a sex thing. You know, you say, K, pressures off, it may or may not work, but let's just go and try some G-spot play, or let's just try some nipple play and see how it goes. It can be a really cool way to approach some of these erogenous zones. In a way that's like, maybe it'll work, maybe it won't, let's just see. Okay, so we had a variety of questions coming in, and I'm just gonna pick up on questions that relate to the topic we were talking about today, which is erogenous zones of course, so the first one I'm gonna pick up on, is why do people wear nipple clamps? So if this is your question, grab your pen and paper, or your modern version of note taker, the reasons people wear nipple clamps. So, the nipples are an erogenous zone, so some people like to wear nipple clamps purely for the pleasurable sensation of having the clamps squeezing on the nipple. So if your nipple is less sensitive, you know, if it's an area that's not gonna be stimulated by a light touch, a nipple clamp can give some people that intensity of sensation that helps them really feel that pleasure. Nipple clamps can also be used as kind of like a kinky control thing, like, they can be a little bit painful, or somebody can say, consensually, I'm gonna put this nipple clamp on you, and it might be uncomfortable for the person, but it's kind of part of the kinky play. So there's different kind of ways that nipple clamps can be used. It could be purely for sensation, or they could be for a little bit of pain and discomfort within the context of like a kinky power play thing. So a couple of different reasons why, why nipple clamps might be used. Okay, let's see. We've got a question about female ejaculation, we've got a question about oral sex, question about masturbation, which one? Okay, so maybe the oral sex question relates most closely to what we've been talking about today. So this question is, I'm having a hard time with oral on my girlfriend. She's the first girl I've ever dated, that's very sweet, and I'm glad this person, I'm glad you, if you're watching, is asking for advice, because it can be really, sort of, a lot of pressure, you know? To know what you're doing the first time. One thing about sex is we never really, or we seldom have opportunities to learn skills, you know? We're supposed to somehow enter the bedroom and suddenly know how to do everything without ever having been instructed on it. So it can feel like a lot of pressure, you know? You're trying to impress somebody, you wanna be suave, you wanna have your skills, you also want them to have a genuinely good time. But if you don't know what to ask or if they're not really helping you with information about what they like or if they don't know what they like, it can be really tricky. So, in this context I'm assuming that it's like a cisgendered partnership, so somebodies going down on a vulva, and so my tips there, let me see what pearls of wisdom I can impart. My first pearl of wisdom is, start more generally, like I said, people often want to go straight for the clit, to be like yes I know where it is, this is the major part, and yes, clit stuff is really important, but I would say start more generally, obviously start by arousing the persons whole body, but even on the vulva, start to stimulate more generally. And then I'd say, once the person's aroused, and they're obviously really enjoying it, then you wanna focus on clitoral stimulation. At first, it's nice to have a varied kind of stimulation, so like, using different rhythms on the tongue, and with the tongue, and different pressures, perhaps moving the tongue slowly over the clit, perhaps going around the clit, and not exactly on it, that variation can be really enjoyable at first. So that's a good time to experiment with different pressures and say, how was that? Did you like that, did you want more of that? And as a person gets more aroused, if they're into it, then it's better to keep a more consistent pressure, and more consistent kind of rhythm and to make sure that you keep doing what you're doing, 'cause disrupting it can be, people can lose their pleasure or lose their orgasm if you can't maintain it. So it can feel like a lot of pressure, like my jaw feels sore, I'm not used to this. So look, if you get tired, just say hey, sorry, I'm a bit tired, can I use my hand? Or would you like to use your own hand even? Those are ways to get around the jaw problem. But I would, yeah, my advice is start general, varied at first, consistent as you move further on. And of course, fourth piece of advice, just make sure you're communicating with the person. What do you like, do you like this? More or less, that kind of thing. And that's true for all different erogenous zones. So those are the two questions, those actually were the two questions that were most related to what we were doing today, and it brings us to the end of the hour. So I'm gonna wrap up there, tie a knot on that, and say, thank you very much for your participation today, I really enjoyed your comments in the chat, and your questions that kept it lively, and it also kept it on track with what you wanted to know. So that's really awesome, so stay tuned for the next stream, which is Micky Allen talking about sex and faith. And I'll see you next time. Thanks! Bye!

All About Erogenous Zones

Date
Wed
Sep 12, 2018
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1:00 pm
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Calendar
Wednesday, September 12, 2018
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1:00 pm

The G spot is just one of many erotic zones. Learn them all, you won't be sorry.

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